Just Shoot Me....please!

I'm being murdered slowly today by my kids. No, really. They are
"LOUDing" me to death. I woke up today with an ass-kicking head
ache and four tylenols, food, 4 cups of coffee, water and a healthy
poop have done nothing to make it go away. The kids seem to talk
in higher pitched, louder voices, crank the tv up higher and find
any and all irritating noise makers to play with near me. My ears
are hyper-sensitive and the barbells are clanking, the wolf-whistling
rythmnless rap artist-wannabe is attempting to rhyme, the whining
9 yr old is tattling non-stop, Randa belching the alphabet to Q in
a volume and vibrato only matched by Barney, the drunk on the
Simpsons. Hamo is kinda quiet actually because he's too tired to be
loud after getting up at 6:30 and going to school and immediately to
private tutoring, coming home for a sandwich and then off to the
Nubian center for a math tutoring session. Of course, he's working
other aspects of "headache-dom" by telling me line by line the last
episode of Spongebob Squarepants or whatever other insipid cartoon
he just watched. I'm wondering if a harpoon to the temple would be
the way to go. It seems so much more merciful than having Aiman
"chop" his oreo cookies into the milk with his spoon to make "mud"
while my eyeballs begin to bleed and my brains start to leak out of
my ears and nostrils.
Come on, Time. Fly! Wudya??? Bedtime must come soon for my
very survival depends on it!